To be the second

5.30 in the morning (no, it's not a new song by Gwen Stefani)

For the whole day my laptop has kept on repeating the soundtrack of "The love of Siam". Well, it's quite weird that I don't understand a word, but I love the song! Maybe it's the magic of melody, haha. I used to criticize people who listen to music without understanding it, back to the time when K-Pop and J-pop were so so so much popular in my country; and now I'm falling for a song that I don't understand wth it is singing. E hem... I should take back my words...

I just took a look at my own blog again and realized that most of my entries have either a song, a movie, or a story with them. Conclusion? I'm the person that is easily inspired by entertainment!!! Haha. If only I could make money out of it, for example, be a movie critique, hee hee... My life would have been much more relaxing and enjoying.

Anyway, that's not the main idea of this entry. "To be the second", yup, it is. I'm not blaming my fate, but it seems that I am the person of the second, not the first.

I look at the poster of "The love of Siam", and I prefer the less handsome guy to the more handsome one.

If I were given a list of a hundred of choices to choose from, most of the time I would choose the option that is second of less most chosen one.

No matter how hard I try to do something, the best position I've ever achieved is the second. I've never enjoyed the feeling of being "the best".

Erm, am I whining about my fate here? Hehe, no... just having random thoughts running in my mind.

People's expectation is one of their motivations. Say, for example, if I expect to be extremely rich and have enough money to buy anything I want in the future [oh yea I love that], I would be more motivated to study and get a good grade now. On the other hand, if I only expect to be able to afford a house, a car, and just enough money to travel here and there, once in a while, I would just need to get an average grade.

That makes me think.

Well, then, isn't it true that people's happiness is somehow constituted, or at least strongly affected, by their expectation too? Say, for example, two guys live in exactly the same conditions, in the same house, drive the same car, earn the same salary, etc. The one who has lower expectation would be happier, correct?

Erm, then, why don't people just lower their expectation? This world would be a better place! Haha...

That might answer why although they have less, the people in the countryside are usually happier than those in the city .

On the contrary, some might argue that because of those high expectations that we are having what we have today. I am not denying this. We would not have had the hi-fi surround sound systems in our houses, if we were already happy with our mono speakers.

That's why human is different from other animals. The human brain is amazing!

Well, but have we ever stopped for a while and asked "are we too intelligent?". One of my professors used to comment this: "We are working much harder nowadays, so that we can earn more money. Then, we use the money we earn to cure the diseases that are caused by overwork".

What he said had its meanings and implications.

Like what Madonna sang in her "American Life":
I tried to stay ahead, I tried to stay on top
I tried to play the part, but somehow I forgot
Just what I did it for and why I wanted more
This type of modern life - Is it for me?

I think I'm happy with being only the second and not the best...

Again, I am contradicting myself, haha...

I would stop the discussion here, before it goes too far... to nowhere, haha... I don't wanna make my blog become some philosophy or psychology forum, hehe...

Just another random thought of mine.

"To all the loves that bring us to life"... [2]

Mew: "...If we love someone so much, can we take it, that one day we will be apart? And... That being apart is a part of life? Is it possible that we love someone, and at the same time not afraid of losing them?... [or] is it possible that we can live without loving anyone at all?..."

"To all the loves that bring us to life"...

I just finished watching "The love of Siam". Well, I hv nothing to comment about this movie... It's just too good. Just watch it! (For those of you who are wise enough to not know what Siam is, it's Thailand, haha... bitchy me!)

The movie really makes me smile, not because of the handsome and cute actors and actresses haha. The love depicted through the movie is just so unforgettable. Once in a while, chances like this make me feel that life is pink again =).

april. 05. 2008.